RELATIONSHIPS AND EMOTIONS

RELATIONSHIPS AND EMOTIONS

Introduction
Think of a situation where you know or love no one in the world and no one knows, loves, speaks to or even looks at you; yet all the other people know, love and speak to each other. How would they feel?
The first topic in English Language at secondary school is Personal Life and family. In this topic you were able to narrate experiences, as well as read and respond to stories about personal life. You in particular, among other things, researched about the family tree, discussed how to handle conflict in the family and also learned how to express likes and dislikes.
In this topic, Relationships and Emotions, you are going to use the knowledge and skills you acquired from Personal Life and Family to describe your relationships with different people and also to understand/learn new language to express your opinion. Are your relationships with other people friendly or not? Are they genuine or pretended?

1.Vocabulary: In pairs:
Read each of the following words:
Love, hate, cherish, detest, demean, relationship, emotions, gender, possessl
scared, lurking, phrase, conditional, clause, stress, cope
2.What comes to your mind when you read each word?
3.Discuss where the above words apply in relationships.

5.1 Knowing Different Types of Relationships within the Family
You each have a family you are born into and belong to. The family, as studied in the first Chapter One of Book One, consists of different members depending on the type of family. It is important for family members to respect one another. Families have lineages (roots they come from). Who are the members of your family?
How are you related to one another?
Activity 5.1: Class Discussion
In pairs:

1. Identify and discuss types of families found in the different communities of Uganda that you are familiar with.
2. Describe the relationship between you and your family members.

Activity 5.2: Work in Pairs
Describe your family lineage (history) to your neighbor in class as he/she draws your family tree based on the information you provide. In the description you provide, include the relationship between the different members of your family (using possessives).
I. Draw a family tree basing on the description given by your neighbour in class.

2. In pairs, talk about your personal relationships. Use as many possessives as
   possible while constructing your sentences.
   5.3 Expressing Emotions Situation and person appeals to your emotions

2. n a different way. This is so because of
   the feelings that the situation or person arouses in you. While expressing emotions,
   we use different forms of emotive expressions like emotive verbs and adjectives.
   Emotive expressions are the choice of words that aim at appealing to emotions

Choose four emotive verbs and four emotive adjectives and use them to construct at least five sentences.

That it is impossible to be angry at someone you truly love for more than 3 days? (Psychological fact)

Listening Skill
Recite the poem below.
Tingling
When I first saw you
I was scared of talking to you
When I talked to you
I was scared you would not answer
When you answered
was scared you would shout at me
When I discovered you were beautiful
I was scared I would fall in love with you
When I fell in love with you
I was scared you would never fall in love with me
When you fell in love with me
Now I am so scared…
Aidah am so scared that you could leave me
I am so scared
But I am still in love with you
And, I love you.
Listen,
My heart beats hard,
hard against my chest.
Inside I fall apart
Listen to my tears roll into my blood
Lay your head on my chest
and listen to my inside
You will hear who I am
My heart
I wrapped my heart around you
Listen
Touch
Smell
Hear
Taste
I am wrapped around you
But this fear;
lurking
listen, inside is the fear

2. What emotions does the poem arouse in you?
3. Identify emotive words.

Activity 5.3: Class Discussion
With reasons, express how you feel about any one family member using emotive verbs and adjectives.
5.4 Knowing and Appreciating Different Types of Relationships and Emotions
It is important that you know the different types of relationships between the people in your communities so as to be able to appreciate and understand them. This will help you live at peace with yourself and with everyone else around you.

Activity 5.4(a): Comprehension
Read the passage below and answer the questions that follow.
Baby Ami is Born
For some time all was quiet and I silently praised my great ancestor who had taken away my mother’s pain, when the God of the white missionaries had failed to help me. Then suddenly, she cried out again and I heard the women exhorting her, ‘That is right! Do not stop! It is almost here! Now, again!
I could not stay in bed, I crept out of the bedroom, glided along the verandah, and stepped into the sitting-room. A few minutes later, my father entered the room. He looked at me, but he said nothing. Perhaps he did not see me. He sat silently in one of the arm-chairs.
The next moment, the cry of a baby ran through the house. My father leaped out of his chair and ran into my mother’s bedroom. I began to follow him but he saw me and ordered me to return to his room. From there I heard my mother ask, ‘What is it?’
And my grandmother replied, ‘A girl! A beautiful girl!’ “It is a big child! one of the women remarked.
And its lips are beautifully black,’ the other added. I crept to the doorway and was in time to see the cord cut with a piece of broken bottle. My father left the house, awoke a nearby storekeeper, and brought
back to my mother a bottle of beer which he and the women insisted on her drinking. Then her attendants helped her walk to the bathroom, where they washed nd dressed her.
Meanwhile, I watched my grandmother wrap up the baby in a cloth and laid her on a new mat on the floor. I crept into the room. My father looked up and smiled at me.
‘There is your sister,’ he said. Without a word, I quickly lay down beside her. ‘Be careful, ‘Kofi,’ my father warned. ‘Do not disturb your little sister.’

I was filled with love for her. I wanted to hold her in my arms. I wanted to shield her from every harm. I wanted to touch her tiny hands. I lay quiet and still beside her until my mother and her attendants returned in a slow procession. My mother sank back onto her bed which my grandmother had made clean for her. One of the women picked up the baby and rubbed her all over with palm-oil,
and wrapped her in a clean cloth and put her into my mother’s arms. This was my sister, Ami. Her name was decided for her by the day on which she was born. Her name was Ami’ because she was born on a Saturday, just as my name is ‘Kofi’ because I was born on a Friday.

[Source: Brown, N (7975) Reading, Talking & Writing; A Fresh Approach to Comprehension and Composition. Heinemann Educational Books Ltd, Nairobi]

Questions:
In pairs:

1. Describe the emotions that the family in the extract experiences just befor4 and after the baby is born.
2. Identify the words used to express the different emotions of the people in the family.
3. Share the personal relationships in your family using emotive expressions to express your feelings and those of your family members.

Activity 5.4(b): Group work
In groups:

1. Discuss all the relationships you are familiar with. Who are the people and what items or animals are involved in these relationships and why do you think the relationships are so special that everyone else must know about them? Present your answers to the whole class for discussion.
2. Identify all the relationships you can think of. They could be between humans or humans and other creatures. Present your list before the whole class for discussion.
3. Discuss how the following factors can affect relationships:
   a) culture
   b) gender
   c) age
   d) religion
   Present your answers to the whole class for further discussion.
4. Apart from the factor in (c) above, discuss the other factors that you and the people in your community find very important in starting or not starting a relationship with other people and how these factors may affect the relationship. Present your work to the whole class for further discussion.

Problem Solving: Mixed Feelings
There are times when a person feels both happy and sad or satisfied and dissatisfied at the same time. At such times, many individuals are not in position to explain their feelings. Think of how best such individuals can express themselves when they are in this state of mixed feelings.

Investigation: Empathy or sympathy?
Empathy and sympathy are two words that start with different letters but end with ‘l…mpathy”. Find out what each word means and how different they are from each other.
5.5 Knowing the Consequences of Some Relationships, Such as that Between Members of the Opposite Sex
Who is your best friend? Do you always do the right thing whenever you are with them? What is it that you do most of the time you are together? Every relationship has consequences. Every time you think of starting any kind of relationship, you should first consider its consequences. In this part of the topic, you are going to participate in activities through which you
will know the consequences of some relationships.

Questions:
1.What kind of relationship exists between Makabu and Nambi in?
2.What conflict is arising in•the dialogue?
3.How is the conflict resolved?
4.What does this teach you about managing relationships?
5.Mention any other three types of relationships that you know of.
6.Discuss the consequences of each relationship mentioned in 5 above.

Activity 5.5 (b): Reflect
Reflect on how culture, gender, age and religion can affect relationships with the opposite gender and between friends.

5.6 Understanding a Variety of Texts on the Topic to Form/Reinforce Personal Opinions
Relationships may work out (succeed) or fail. Do you know of anyone whose
relationship failed? It could be between a husband and wife, a parent and a child,
friends and many others. In your opinion, what causes failure in some relationships?
Why do other relationships succeed? There are many types of relationships that exist
in the world and these include; romantic relationships and friendship.

Activity 5.6(a): Brainstorm

1. List the examples of relationships that exist in the world.
2. How important are the types of relationships mentioned above.
   Activity 5.6(b): Class Discussion
   Listen to an audio to be provided by your teacher. The audio is of two lovers/
   siblings/parents talking about the status of their relationship. After listening to the
   child, discuss why you think their relationship could have failed or succeeded.

Activity 5.6(c): (Poem on Forming and Reinforcing Personal Opinions)

Truly Caring
You will enjoy this story, it’s easy to understand.
It is about Wan Kamil, a wonderful friend.
In his garden, a small budding tree had grown;
It was not planted it seemed to have come on its own
Wan Kamil figured out without too many words
That it must have been animals, most likely birds
That brought to his garden the seeds of this tree
That has grown now with many fruits, a pleasure to see.
The papayas on the tree are delicious and plentiful
And my friend, Kamil with a soul so beautiful
Understands perfectly nature’s and the animal’s needs.
It is the birds who will spread more amazing seeds.

He leaves some of the papayas that are ripe on the tree
The animals and birds seem to have a feast for free
But in the process, they will ensure that in some place
Another papaya tree will grow by our Creator’s grace.

Questions:

1. What is the poem about?
2. Who is the speaker in the poem?
3. Describe the relationship that exists between Wan Kamil, the animals and the birds.
4. How does Wan Kamil show his gratitude towards the animals and birds?

) Activity 5.6(e): Read and Write
Read the passage below and answer the questions that follow.
Importance of Parent-Child Relationship
parenting is the most fulfilling job that we will ever have, but it’s not without its challenges. Modern family life can be stressful and with various pressures on families it’s not always easy. Ultimately, parents want what is best for their child and a strong parent-child relationship can help lead to better outcomes for children.

The Parent-Child Relationship is important since it is one that nurtures the physical, emotional and social development of the child. It is a unique bond that every child and parent can enjoy and nurture, This relationship lays the foundation for the child’s personality, life choices and overall behaviour. It can also affect the strength of their social, physical, mental and emotional health. A good Parent-Child relationship has a number of benefits. Young children who grow with a secure and healthy attachment to their parents stand a better chance of developing happy and content relationships with others in their life. A
child who has a secure relationship with a parent learns to regulate emotions under stress and in difficult situations. It also promotes the child’s mental, linguistic and emotional development.
Healthy parent involvement and intervention in the child’s day-to-day life lays the foundation for their better social and academic skills, helping the child. exhibit
optimistic and confident social behaviors. A secure attachment leads to a healthy social emotional, cognitive, and motivational development. Children also gain strong problem-solving skills when they have a positive relationship with their parents. For positive Parenting, there is “one-size fits all”. We change and adapt as our children grow. However, following some simple positive parenting tips can help z when it comes to your relationship with our child.

treat every interaction as an opportunity to connect with your child. Be warm in your expressions, give eye connect, smile and encourage interaction. However always ensure to have boundaries, rules & consequences. Children need structure and guidance. Talk to your children about what you expect of them and make sure they understand. Listen and empathise with them.
Acknowledge your child’s feelings, show them you understand, and reassure that you are there to help them whenever they have problems. Help your child to problem solve. Be a good role model and show them how to behave through your own actions. When you work with your children to find solutions, they learn how to
deal with diffculties in an appropriate way. Forming a connection with your child is important to developing a strong parent-child relationship. Here are some tips to help with strengthening your relationship with your children.
Of course, you love your children but tell them every day, no matter what age they are. Even on difficult days let your child know you didn’t like the behavior but you love them unconditionally. A simple “l love you” can do a lot to strengthen a relationship. Play is so important to children’s development. Young children can develop many skills through the power of play As well as it being fun and helping
you develop your relationship with your child, it can help children’s language skills, emotions, creativity and social skills.
The Department of Education and Playboard have developed a range of resources on play for parents with the #PIayMatters campaign. Make time to talk to your child without any distractions, even 10 minutes a day can make a big difference in establishing good communication habits. Turn off the TV, put away technology and spend some quality time together.

Eatingftogether as a family sets the stageför conversation. Encourage no technology at the table and enjoy each other’s company. Connection starts with listening. Try and see things from your child’s perspective and foster mutual respect.
If you have more than one child try and make a point of spending individual time with each of them. Quality, individual time with your child can strengthen your bond, builds their self-esteem and lets them know they are valued. Slightly adapted from October 25, 2018 Blog Parent-Child Relationship,
Parenting Week

Questions:
In pairs:

1. What is the importance of developing a good Parent-Child relationship?
2. In two paragraphs, summarise the ways in which one can improve their Parent-Child relationship.

5.7 Using the Relative Pronoun, whose
‘Whose’ is one of the relative pronouns in English. It is used to refer to or question
ownership of something.
Examples:

1. Whose mother is she?
2. My nurse wanted to know whose twins we were.
3. The girl whose bag fell, was forgiven.
   Other relative pronouns are: where, what, which, who, whom, etc
   Activity 5.7(a): Oral Activity
4. Construct ten sentences using ‘whose’.
5. Set questions for each of the sentences above.

Activity 5.7(b): Role-play
John and Ritah have been best friends for ten years. To celebrate their friendship, Ritah suggested that they go to their favorite restaurant for lunch. John did not have enough money so he convinced Ritah to lend him Ten Thousand Shillings which he was to pay the following day but he did not. After several arguments about this debt, John and Ritah broke up.
In pairs, role-play a conversation between John and Ritah. Encourage them to Clearly portray who you think was at fault. Use the relative pronoun ‘whose’ in your dialogue.

5.8 Using Adverbs
Reminder: Adverbs are words that modify verbs and adjectives.
Examples of adverbs include: quietly, humbly, privately
€ Activity 5.8(a): Class Discussion
In groups:
Use the following adverbs to give advice to a friend who would like to express how they feel about a disagreement:
calmly, responsibly, honestly, kindly, reasonably, decently
Activity 5.8(b): Letter Writing

1. Write a letter to your best friend, expressing how honoured you are to have them as your friend.
2. Share your work with your neighbour in class.
3. Read your letter before the whole class for discussion and correction.

5.9 Using The First/Real Conditional: If…,
Future Tense
As you grow, you will encounter many people. They could be neighbours, travel companions, classmates or colleagues whom you might befriend or not. Friendships have a big impact on your mental health and happiness but close friendships do not just happen. What do you think makes a friendship strong?
5.9.1 Future tense
The future tense is a forms of tense used to talk about things that will happen in a time to come. The future tense comes in different forms like the simple future tense, the future continuous, the future perfect tense and future perfect continuous tense.

5.9.2 The fit-st/real conditional
Sentences in the first/real conditional usually have the structure:
If/when + present simple, will + infinitive
The structure is also sometimes used with ‘unless’, ‘as long as’, ‘as soon as’ or ‘in
case’, instead of ‘if’
Examples:
a) If she does not cry, I will applaud her.
b) When the students laugh, the teacher will know.
c) Unless you sing for the baby, he will not stop crying.
d) As long as she gets paid, she will not quit.
e) As soon as she gets married, he will take her home.
f) In case of anything, I will give you a call.

LC Activity 5.9(b): Role-play
In pairs, prepare and perform a role-play on relationship solving between any
relation type of your choice. Use the first/real conditional in your constructions.
CQ – Activity 5.9(c): Practice Exercise
Complete the following sentences with an appropriate first/real conditional.
In case you fall, .
When you come, …
As soon as you wash, .
If she calls you, .
As long as she cries, …
Unless you forgive them, .

5.10 Using Phrasal Verbs

• Activity 5.10(a): Brainstorm

1. What are phrasal verbs?
2. How are phrasal verbs used?
   Phrasal verbs are idiomatic phrases that consist of a verb and another element. They indicate action. Examples include: hang in there, hold on, give up, carry on, let down
   Activity 5.10(b): Research
   Using any available source of information, find out what the phrasal verbs above mean.
3. Find and write other ten phrasal verbs in your notebook.
4. Use phrasal verbs to give instructions related to relationships.

5.11 Using Result Clauses in Speaking and Writing
Result clauses are parts of a sentence that explain the consequence/outcom
of a given action. Result clauses are often introduced by conjunctions such as so
so…that, or such …that
Examples:
a) He was tired and so he left the room.
b) The man was hired so that he could provide his skills.
c) Shout such that they can hear you.
The parts of sentences in bold are the result clauses.
Activity 5.11 (a): Practice Exercise
Write five sentences with result clauses.

• Activity 5.11 (b): Read and Respond
  Read the passage below and answer the questions that follow
  

I Need You to Hear
My parents are over protective. It honestly frustrates me when I am never allowed to go anywhere with my friends or go to places without my parents. They dictate the clothes I wear, the food I eat, where I go and the people I hang out with.

They also determine what time I should go to bed. I have tried to be more understanding and obedient but my parents still treat me like a child. If only they could understand that I am no longer a kid, I have my own opinions, thoughts and preferences.
Last month I requested my parents to allow me attend my best friend’s birth- day party. I was surprised that they allowed me to go out but I had to be home by 10:00 pm. I was enjoying my time at the party and I did not even notice the time and it was 1:00 am. I looked at my phone, I had missed my parent’s calls twenty-five times.
I was grounded for two weeks and my mum confiscated my phone because I didn’t answer her phone calls. I did not get angry or disappointed because it was actually my fault. If I had taken note of the time, I wouldn’t have gotten punished. I still love my parents. I know they love me and want the best for me.
My mum used to tell me in the old days parents were more strict than today. Their parents would never let them go out without any companion. They had to do their chores every day before they could go out, and their parents also picked their suitors for them. I have always found this unbelievable because getting married to a person you don’t love is totally unfair. I cannot imagine myself in such a situation.
There was a time that I had to go to my group discussion, but my mother wouldn’t let me go without any companion. So, I had to go with my cousin to ensure that I

went there and did not go to some other place. I mean I am old enough to go there alone without any companion. I just want to do my own thing and just be me. I want to be independent, and my parents just don’t get it.
My parents are being strict because they are afraid of losing me. As I am their only child it’s their responsibility to protect me. Well, to solve this problem I will probably talk to my parents about them being strict and explain to them how I feel about them being strict. I will also prove to them that I can be a good daughter I will gain their trust so that they will not need to be as strict as before. I just want to
live my life without all these restrictions.

Questions:

1. In pairs, role-play the conversation the writer is likely to have with her parents about how she feels about the way they treat her. (Your role-play must contain conditional sentences and phrasal verbs)
2. Using result clauses, advise the speaker on how to improve her situation.

12 Expressing Opinions Based on Personal Experiences
Opinions are often expressed better out of experiences. Do you remember a time when you had first-hand information that you were supposed to pass on to a certain group of people? How was your experience helpful? Which common phrases an you use when expressing your opinion?
Activity 5.12: Debate
Hold a debate in class with the motion, “Students should wait until they have finished Schooling before engaging in sexual relationships”

Activity 5.13: Composition
Summaries in note form, the main points made on both sides of the debate
(Activity 5.12). In not more than 100 words, compose your own written conclusion.

Psychiatrist
A psychiatrist is a medical doctor that diagnoses, treats and
Career
studies mental disorders. Understanding how patients feel is the backbone of the profession.
ICT Activity
Using the relevant graphics in the Word Processing programme, design a chart with two halves. Fill one half with positive emotions and the other with negative emotions.\

Chapter Summary
In this topic, you have been able to:

know different types of relationships within the family
use possessives
express emotions
know and appreciate different types of relationships and emotions
know the consequences of some relationships, such as that between members
of the opposite sex
understand a variety of texts on the topic to form/reinforce personal opinions
use the relative pronoun, ‘whose’
use adverbs
use the first/real conditional: if…, future tense
use phrasal verbs
use result clauses in speaking and writing