Internet Security Love

I am about to present to you the best masculinity test in the entire world.
Forget all those brain scans. Forget the surveys. If you’re wondering if
someone is a man or not just bust out a nice laser pointer one night, and
shine it on something far away.

If the response is, “you’re stupid”, then you’re talking to a woman. If the
response is, “Holy God, give me that fucking thing”, you’re talking to a
man.

It really is that simple.

Men like to directly influence things. When you light up a stop sign half a
mile down the road with a laser pointer you’re saying to the sign (and
everyone in view), “I am touching you from way over here, and you can’t stop
me. Feel my power.”

When you offer such influence to a woman, in the form of handing her your
laser pointer, you might as well be giving her a steamy turd. It’s like
stupidest thing she’s ever heard of, and she can’t believe that she’d spend
time hanging out with anyone who’d find pleasure in such a thing. And that
makes sense. Men want to wield power, and most women couldn’t care less.

So the next time you’re wondering about whether or not someone is masculine
or not, wield a nice laser pointer in their vicinity. If their pupils dilate
like a 4-year-old boy with a Tonka truck then you know you’re dealing with a
man’s man. ::